Someone told me along time ago “you can’t have your cake and eat it too”. This is an age old cliché that has been told, phoned, texted, tweeted, chap snatted, and I’m sure at one point sent via pigeon. When I think of the times I could have indulged in the act I get cold sweats….I have to remind myself it’s ok to be different even if it means to be different in a weird way which entitles me to be a leader and not a follower. Give me a few minutes and I’ll get to the point just work with me here. Growing up I’ve seen people take it for granted, accepted it as a gift just to hand it off as a regift to someone else, I’ve seen it be used as a door stop, I’ve seen it be ridiculed, down graded, trashed, made ugly faces to it and even gone as far as accepted in haste. I once heard it was used to stop a burglar during a robbery and knocked him unconscious until the police came. What do I speak of? Well the answer is none-other than the brilliantly choreographed, ingredient filled, well balanced solid mass of goodness that is anticipated for 11 long months and sought after for its complex taste yet simple method of administering to the masses in chunks, hunks, lumps, wedges, cubes, bricks, slabs, bars or even as pieces. Not to mention the delectable mouthwatering exquisite texture that if had to be explained in one word would be… no it would have to be two words because one word does it no justice…..”buoyant content”. That’s right I said “content”. A small word with such a thunderous meaning. A meaning that could only hold up to the subject matter at hand. If you guessed it by now then you know I am talking about the one thing that very few people admit too especially this time of year. The big, in the closet secret, the 5 million pound annual production that is discreetly devoured…..usually in denial. The creation of an immigrant named Tos who immigrated to America from Italy, a man with a vision. Tos moved to New York and later found his way to GA where his name would later be recognized for a wonderful invention we know as…….well that’s if you agree with me and I’m sure half the readers won’t. Let me get back to the New York portion…..At one point Tos knew the lively big city lights was too much to handle so he decided to make the venture into a small Georgia town that had nothing more than an ice cream shop for its rendezvous point. This same town also holds rattle snake round ups and his invention would be used to restrain an out of control rattle snake by knocking the snake over the head with it rendering it unconscious. (you seeing the trend here). That ice cream shop was to become the bakery that gave birth to a delectable house hold name product that would stand the test of time. That’s right I’m talking about…….ok I almost forgot, this item is just as durable and delicious as they come. Once produced it can be out of the refrigerator for months without spoiling and can be eaten months later preferably by yourself without friends who will later judge you for eating this product. I’ve seen my Pastor speak of this and was later shunned from church by most of the congregation for 38 seconds. It was the most nerve racking time I’ve had at church. Today we are a little lenient to his taste and are told in the Bible in Colossians 3:13
13 “Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.” So true and for this reason I purchased one for him today. He will be ecstatic, he will be friendless for a few days but ecstatic. By now you must know I’m talking about the raisin filled pecan sprinkled colored pineapple goodness called the fruit cake. That’s right the almighty Fruit cake! If I’ve captured your attention I have a 79 page explanation on why fruit cake should be a staple of everyone’s home. Visit my page at “totally nuts/gone fruity.com”. To join this site you have to register your insanity and pay $1,000 fee and be willing to admit you have a problem. So to reiterate my point. The expression “you can’t have your cake and eat it to” was not referring to the fruit cake. You can have it and eat it too. Apparently no one else will or admit to it. So eat it, and plenty of it and know that we are the few who can have our cake and also eat it. A small yet privileged group who will later have to Join Celebrate Recovery to get rid of the shame of having eaten one. If the fruitcake doesn’t do you in then GOD bless you and remember Coca Cola goes great with fruit cake. But for every other meal and dish in the entire world drink a Pepsi. Until next time please stay GODly, love yourself and your neighbors.
P.S. if you read this give your Pastor a big and let him know he’ll be ok. Not everyone can be perfect.